I have terrible handwriting. Always have, and (naturally) always will.
I had accepted this as fact and didn’t think that there was anything that could be done about it, except, sometimes, when I write really slowly, I’m able to make my handwriting look a little more legible. But, that’s impractical and I have a life to live. Ain’t nobody got time for that.
One day, as I was perusing my local stationery store, on the hunt for more notebooks and cards that I do not need, I impulsively bought Seltzer Goods’ Seven Year Pen that was sitting next to the cash register. I have a proclivity for all things irreverent, so it goes without saying that I would want to purchase a pen that says “Fuck It” on it. And, it’s supposed to last seven years, so I thought that was pretty cool, though I highly doubt that I will be able to test the accuracy of this claim, as it is unlikely that I will ever be able to keep a pen in my possession for more than a year*.
When I got home and started writing, I was in shock at how my handwriting had transformed. My naturally slanted, garish handwriting almost looked cute and girly.
My goodness, I thought. What hath becometh of me?**
I have very much embraced the change in my handwriting (and ostensibly, my personality**) when I use Seltzer Goods’ Seven Year Pen. It’s incredible to be able to write neatly without wasting a lot of time or effort; it also feels good to use anything made by Seltzer Goods, since they are completely sustainable and support environmental causes. Jackpot!
Write neatly, and do good. Buy the Seven Year Pen here.
*Please write to us in seven years to let us know how your pen is doing
**The Seven Year Pen has no effect on personality and will not change your speech to archaic English